SHARE AND ENJOY(or, Go Stick Your Head in a Pig)From the works of Douglas Adams'Share and Enjoy' is of course the company motto of the hugely successful Sirius Cybernetics Corporation Complaints Division, which now covers the major land masses of three medium-sized planets, and is the only part of the Corporation to show a consistent profit in recent years. The motto stands, or stood, in three-mile-high illuminated letters near the Complaints Division spaceport on Eadrax. Unfortunately its weight was such that, shortly after it was erected, the ground beneath the letters caved in and they dropped for nearly half their length through the underground offices of many talented young Complaints Division executives, now deceased. The protruding upper halves of the letters now appear, in the local language, to read: "Go Stick Your Head In A Pig"and are no longer illuminated, except at times of special celebration, when a choir of over two million robots sing the company song 'Share and Enjoy'. Unfortunately - again - another of the computing errors for which the company is justly famous means that the robots' voice boxes are exactly a flattened fifth out of tune, and the result sounds...awful. |